Stress Test.

So right now, I'll admit I'm going through a lot of stuff both physically and emotionally. I mean just this last May I broke my ankle on the inside and out and I was unable to walk for three months and now walking on it feels weird. Right now my girlfriend (yes I'm a lesbian, deal with it) and I are going through a rough patch. And while all this is going on, all I want to do is eat. I wish when I am put under a lot of stress that all I want to do is work out. I want to work out longer and harder. That's my goal. Right now I have two screws and a metal plate in my ankle to support the bone but when I run I feel like a robot. My ankle doesn't bend all the way anymore and because of the whole "CHI and Blue Cross Blue Shield" conundrum I had to stop going to physical therapy to help it heal. 

Not going to lie, I just ate my weight in Taco Bell. I honestly feel like throwing up. Stress sucks. I think tonight I'm going to try running in my new shoes. Run from my weight, my job, my finances, my girlfriend problems. I just want to run away from it all and never look back. Unfortunately the trail that I'm running on goes in a circle so eventually I'll have to deal with all of them. Is this what being an adult is like?? Is this the world I have to live in the rest of my life?? I need to change it. Now!!

You know I saw this one quote and I apologize I don't know who it's from but it said "You are not fat. You have fat. You have fingernails but you are not fingernails." So let me rephrase my statement. "I am not stressed. I have stress." I just need to be like Queen Elsa and let it go! That's what I'm going to do tonight my weight loss friends. I'm going to go running, to get rid of this stress I'm carrying for no good reason. I have stress doesn't mean I'm letting it take control of me.